After Katy Perry rode in on a Transformer covered in flames a la Katniss Everdeen (proof that this is, in fact, the end of days), she managed to strip down to approximately 35 different costumes, even though you felt sure that her last one had to be too tiny to conceal anything. The show mostly consisted of human Kewpie doll/former Christian songstress Katy Perry attempting to hit high notes she couldn’t even fathom, instead of shooting whipped cream out of her 1920s bathing suit tops.
Luckily, her many celebrity cameos distracted from her inability to actually sing. First, Lenny Kravitz, super smoke show, sang about kissing a girl and liking it (he probably thought Katy was actually Katniss).
Check out New Katy Perry’s Super Bowl Tattoo
Then, Missy Elliot, who taught American youths what a one minute man was far before it was appropriate, reminded you why everyone once loved her. The best part of the show happened when a bunch of sharks took the stage and jammed out with Katy Perry, proving that Glee got something right.
It’s entirely possible that Katy Perry’s left shark either drank way too much in excitement over sports, or that he forgot the choreography completely. The right shark has been identified as Scott Myrick, who’s a super hot back-up dancer for Perry. In fact, he specifically posted a picture of himself and Katy, omitting the mysterious left shark from the Instagram.
It’s unclear who the left shark was, but my money’s on Chrissy Teigen. After all, girlfriend was at the Super Bowl, and you know she was having the best time ever.
